Connect with us

Family / Couple

Your relationship makes you lose confidence in yourself: what if you were the victim of a cookie punch?

Published

on

The list of most toxic love practices it gets longer day by day. Last on the list: the jarring cookie. This trend refers to a particularly cruel behavior adopted by people who do not want to enter into a more stable relationship or get us out of their lives.

What is “cookie jarring”?

Until now relatively unknown, this practice increasingly affects sentimental relationships. In French, “discordant cookie” means “ store in a cookie jar “. The psychologist Catalina Lawsin, in an interview with nbc news, described it as “an unbalanced relationship that is, for one of the partners, a perfectly normal and respectful relationship, but for the other it is just a security plan B.” This implies thatwe keep someone under our elbow. The cookie is a metaphorical representation to represent an individual that we consider as a backup plan.

This toxic love tendency is based on an imbalance. In fact, the two individuals generally do not attach the same degree of importance to the relationship. While one gives his all by being 100% involved, the other plays on several fronts. Followers of this practice are generally people who get tired quite quickly. Catalina Lawsin says that cookie mismatch can also hide fear of abandonment. They see several people at once to minimize the risk of being alone.

You may also like :   How should I respond to the hurtful attitude of my son and his wife?

Identify manipulation in love to protect yourself from it.

the toxic love practices they multiply and their consequences are sometimes minimized. Being a victim of the cookie mismatch can alter the self confidence. Therefore, it is essential to learn to identify this toxic behavior. But its signs are not always easy to spot and often go unnoticed. In the NBC News article, American psychotherapist Tina B. Tessina warns against certain attitudes. The fact that a couple has no project with us and that they always want to see us at the last moment are elements that, according to her, should put us on alert.

Experts also advise trust your instincts and listen to each other. “If you’re dating someone, but you’re still feeling a little uneasy about your status in their life, chances are they’re screwing you,” Theresa Herring, an American marriage therapist, told NBC News.

to go further

Continue Reading
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Family / Couple

Breath play or erotic suffocation, a dangerous sexual practice

Published

on

It is sexual behavior that is controversial. the breathing game which literally means “breath play”, is a form of erotic asphyxiation practiced during sexual intercourse. But its dangerousness is often overlooked.

What is the breathing game?

ends sexual arousal”, defines the English version of Wikipedia. In practice, “erotic asphyxia” consists ofchoking your partner in the middle of a sexual act. However, playing with your breath can be very dangerous, even deadly. “May result in accidental death by suffocation,” the definition says.

However, despite the risk of injury or fainting, this practice has many adherents. A study conducted in 2021 among 4,000 American students indicates that 26.5% of those surveyed had drowned during their last sexual encounter. Another study carried out the same year on other students reveals more worrying figures: 58% of them have already been suffocated by a partner.

L’suffocation erotic it is also very popular in BSDM circles. A french website dedicated to this type of sexual practices, explains that this restriction of breathing is “practiced in different ways: hanging, suffocation, placing the head in a plastic bag or strangulation,” reports an article in female earth.

A sexual practice that can be deadly

Very risky, the breathing game was popularized by the porn industry, making it an act in its own right, especially in sexual relations marked by domination. But in reality, the consequences of this sexual practice can be fatal. Too much pressure on the larynx can cause death.

You may also like :   To have a satisfying sex life, you need to look at sex in this way

Although there are no official figures on the number of deaths caused by this practice, Grace Millane, a 22-year-old woman, died from it in 2018. Police found traces of strangulation that could correspond to a “four to five minute” suffocation. His partner, Jesse Kempton, was convicted of femicide and sentenced to life in prison. The defense had confided “that the young woman had accidentally died at the end of a sexual game that had gone wrong, a version that had been categorically rejected by the jury,” he recalls. paris party.

Continue Reading

Family / Couple

Couple: what your position on the sofa says about your relationship

Published

on

the posture adopted by couples when they sit on a sofait’s a window into your relationship status. This is the conclusion of a study conducted by Georgina Barnett, a British psychologist, on 2,000 cohabiting couples. “Tell me how you’re sitting, I’ll tell you if everything is fine in your relationship,” says the specialist in an interview with Stylish Maternity.

Sitting next to each other: a sign of imbalance?

While most couples tend to sit on the couch together, there are some pretty subtle signs that it can be signs of relationship problems. When the partners occupy only one corner of the bench and are too close together, this is synonymous with imbalance in your relationship. “The comfortable person in the corner takes up the space, is confident, and has power in the relationship. The other, on the other hand, seems less confident. He is looking for contact and reassurance, ”explains Georgina Barnett.

However, there is a nuance when they sit more in the center of the sofa, maintaining physical contact, such as a hand on the thigh or another. “Couples established in this way have trust your relationship and therefore can afford personal space. It is a mixture of intimacy and freedom”, analyzes the psychologist. But although in love, the latter no longer experience the passion of the first days, according to the expert.

When the position on the sofa heralds a crisis

According to the psychologist, time is serious in the event that the two partners are sitting at two different ends. “It’s even worse if her legs are crossed in opposite directions,” she says. This posture is generally a sign of a Tension in the couple. It can also be a sign that something was left unsaid or resentment, according to Georgina Barnett.

You may also like :   How should I respond to the hurtful attitude of my son and his wife?

And contrary to what one might think, if the partners are based on different bases, distanced from each other, it does not necessarily mean that they are in crisis. can only be couples comfortable enough with each other to have their own space. Although this study is based on a fairly large sample, its conclusions must be taken with caution.

to go further

Continue Reading

Family / Couple

The Relationship Escalator: Are You Following This Conventional Love Pattern?

Published

on

Dating, formalizing your relationship, living together, getting married and having children. Many people perceive this life path map as the ultimate blueprint. This diagram has a name: the relationship escalator. The goal of those who take it is to peak by aging together, after checking a certain number of boxes.

What is a “relationship escalator”?

This expression designates a love pattern widespread, but increasingly questioned within society. The Urban DictionaryThe bible of slang and popular expressions defines the relationship ladder as “the societal expectation that a romantic relationship should automatically follow a set of stages and lead to marriage, parenthood, and home ownership.”

Amy Gahran, author of Off the Relationship Escalator, Uncommon Love and Life, was the first to mention this concept. She explains that this notion is “a standard by which most people assess whether an intimate relationship that develops is meaningful, serious, good, healthy, committed, or worth pursuing or maintaining.” In other words, the escalator of the relationship denotes ME’set of beliefs that perceive the most conventional pattern of love as the most rewarding and valued. This concept is made up of several steps that can vary depending on the culture. But they generally follow this timeline:

• Flirt for a few weeks/months

• Becoming sexually and emotionally exclusive

• Introduce your partner to loved ones

You may also like :   Divorced parents: joint custody would promote women's economic autonomy

• Live together

• Get married or settle down

• Acquire real estate

• Have children

• Get old together

A satisfactory relational schema if it is not imposed

There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking this kind of path of love if it makes us happy. Instead, what can be problematic is imposing it on others as an absolute norm and the only valid model. Pointing fingers at this practice is also a way of denouncing the constant pressure on singles and couples who do not formalize their civil unions.

Gabrielle Smith, an author and poet who is very sensitive to issues related to sexuality and romantic relationships, analyzes this practice in an article by granist “The relationship escalator is designed for heterosexual relationships between singles and preferably for relationships within a two-income middle-class household. Many people are not part of this demographic, and those who are still feel the pressure it brings. »

If this mandate can affect all genders, it is particularly intense when it comes to heterosexual women. “Society makes you think it’s easy to get married, have children, or combine finances. But the reality for many is that it is neither possible nor smart”, concludes Gabrielle Smith.

Continue Reading

Trending