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Mixed family: how to manage arguments?

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Assure him of your affection.

Rivalry for parental love and attention exists in everyone brothers, but in the stepfamilies, is often exacerbated, especially if one of the children lives there only intermittently. And if the other took advantage of it to “steal” his father, his mother? “Disputes between quasi-siblings are sometimes a symptom of significant stress, unrelated to their affinities, explains Christophe Fauré, psychiatrist and psychotherapist and author of How to love yourself and your children? The challenge of the mixed-race family (Albin Michel, 2014).

The child is sad to see his father less, he hates this woman who displaced his mother, this man who takes himself for his father, and suddenly confronts the “other” child. “He probably needs to be sure of your lovewith words and deeds.

reserve it a few moments alone. Encourage him to express his concerns, tell him that you understand, but that your life has changed. Show him that he has a place here as well as with his other parent: for example, if he doesn’t have his own room, reserving a shelf in the bathroom for him, with his towel and toothbrush.

Harmonize your lifestyles, be fair

A family in recomposition is two universes that meet, with different habits and values. Here, we go to bed at 8 pm; there at 10 pm Here, we have a soft drink at the table; there, water. These educational differences are a source of disputes, because children experience them as injustices.

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“The new spouses must address these problems before moving in together, advises Christophe Fauré, and try to harmonize their lifestyles, their educational principles. »

If the children do not follow the rules, try to react as naturally as possible, putting aside your feelings: your guilt for imposing this situation on your child, your partner’s desire to be accepted by him. An excess of indulgence with one, and it is assured conflict.

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Be patient

Don’t forget, finally, that your son has just gone through an ordeal. He had to mourn his former life, regained a precarious footing, forged special bonds with you during the period when you were alone, and now an in-laws invaded his space! His adaptive capacities are probably saturated.

Give him time to tame this stepfather or this quasi-brother, whom he did not choose and whom he is not obliged to appreciate. He accepts that his aggressiveness sometimes reflects on them, as long as he stays reasonable. Aggression is a natural reaction to an unstable situation. Time is essential for a family to rebuild itself, really.

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Family / Couple

The 4 favorite methods of women to achieve clitoral orgasm

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Despite scientific advances, female pleasure is still synonymous with mystery. Many studies have investigated the clitoris and its secrets, but never has the word been so free on the subject. It is in this continuity that American researchers compiled the responses of a panel of 3,017 women between the ages of 18 and 93 to make their way the secrets of sexual pleasure and clitoral orgasm. Published in April 2021, this study highlights 4 techniques women use to make vaginal penetration more pleasurable: angling, rocking, shallow penetration, and pairing.

Shallowing: multiply the pleasure by a superficial touch

84% of women resort to superficiality to, once again, increase pleasure during vaginal penetration. Behind this name, which translates into French as “superficial”, hides a pretty shallow touch, penetrating right at the entrance of the vagina. It can be done with the tip of the finger, a toy, the tip of the penis, the tongue, or the lips.

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Breath play or erotic suffocation, a dangerous sexual practice

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It is sexual behavior that is controversial. the breathing game which literally means “breath play”, is a form of erotic asphyxiation practiced during sexual intercourse. But its dangerousness is often overlooked.

What is the breathing game?

ends sexual arousal”, defines the English version of Wikipedia. In practice, “erotic asphyxia” consists ofchoking your partner in the middle of a sexual act. However, playing with your breath can be very dangerous, even deadly. “May result in accidental death by suffocation,” the definition says.

However, despite the risk of injury or fainting, this practice has many adherents. A study conducted in 2021 among 4,000 American students indicates that 26.5% of those surveyed had drowned during their last sexual encounter. Another study carried out the same year on other students reveals more worrying figures: 58% of them have already been suffocated by a partner.

L’suffocation erotic it is also very popular in BSDM circles. A french website dedicated to this type of sexual practices, explains that this restriction of breathing is “practiced in different ways: hanging, suffocation, placing the head in a plastic bag or strangulation,” reports an article in female earth.

A sexual practice that can be deadly

Very risky, the breathing game was popularized by the porn industry, making it an act in its own right, especially in sexual relations marked by domination. But in reality, the consequences of this sexual practice can be fatal. Too much pressure on the larynx can cause death.

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Although there are no official figures on the number of deaths caused by this practice, Grace Millane, a 22-year-old woman, died from it in 2018. Police found traces of strangulation that could correspond to a “four to five minute” suffocation. His partner, Jesse Kempton, was convicted of femicide and sentenced to life in prison. The defense had confided “that the young woman had accidentally died at the end of a sexual game that had gone wrong, a version that had been categorically rejected by the jury,” he recalls. paris party.

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Couple: what your position on the sofa says about your relationship

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the posture adopted by couples when they sit on a sofait’s a window into your relationship status. This is the conclusion of a study conducted by Georgina Barnett, a British psychologist, on 2,000 cohabiting couples. “Tell me how you’re sitting, I’ll tell you if everything is fine in your relationship,” says the specialist in an interview with Stylish Maternity.

Sitting next to each other: a sign of imbalance?

While most couples tend to sit on the couch together, there are some pretty subtle signs that it can be signs of relationship problems. When the partners occupy only one corner of the bench and are too close together, this is synonymous with imbalance in your relationship. “The comfortable person in the corner takes up the space, is confident, and has power in the relationship. The other, on the other hand, seems less confident. He is looking for contact and reassurance, ”explains Georgina Barnett.

However, there is a nuance when they sit more in the center of the sofa, maintaining physical contact, such as a hand on the thigh or another. “Couples established in this way have trust your relationship and therefore can afford personal space. It is a mixture of intimacy and freedom”, analyzes the psychologist. But although in love, the latter no longer experience the passion of the first days, according to the expert.

When the position on the sofa heralds a crisis

According to the psychologist, time is serious in the event that the two partners are sitting at two different ends. “It’s even worse if her legs are crossed in opposite directions,” she says. This posture is generally a sign of a Tension in the couple. It can also be a sign that something was left unsaid or resentment, according to Georgina Barnett.

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And contrary to what one might think, if the partners are based on different bases, distanced from each other, it does not necessarily mean that they are in crisis. can only be couples comfortable enough with each other to have their own space. Although this study is based on a fairly large sample, its conclusions must be taken with caution.

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